Film Review: Phantom Thread
All film reviews can be found on my letterboxd.
Review
A perfectly acceptable work that cries out the dangers of contentedness.
The film is quite pleasant to look at. The wardrobes, of course, are a visual treat. The score carries the film. The pieces are alluring, though sometimes lacking intention. And yet, the work done with the piano captivated me for the entire film.
The narrative is inconsistent, weak, and directionless, but the piece is saved by an startlingly strong conclusion. The first act is a slow wade into what one expects to be a milquetoast, female gaze, quasi-Hallmark romance story. The second act is a meandering of artificial interpersonal conflicts and the realization of our protagonist that life is all but rosy. The third act continues the torture of our poor love interest (Reynolds Woodcock), but transforms into a suspenseful release of sanity from our leads.
The message is clear: the desire for normalcy and support will literally kill you. Or, at least, it will keep you alive and torture you while you decay into a form too far separated from when you could take care of yourself. There are some consistent themes, such as his longing for his mother translating into his undisclosed desire to be taken care (so far, by his sister, and ultimately by Alma). There are also some cinematic themes that develop, such as her pouring tea/water which demonstrates her (un)willingness to sacrifice herself for what she desires.
In theory, it’s a demonstration that learning to love and soften up is not wholly an act of defeat or victory. In practice, it’s a collection of loosely related threads that come to form a boring work that is saved by a novel ending and a lovely score.
Notes
Cool opening music.
Very cool opening music, nice simple piano.
I wish I had a morning routine like this.
I wonder what year this takes place. 70s? 1800s?
Pleasant dynamic camera shots.
Crazy wallpaper, I love it.
Very male-gaze character right out the gate, this guy is who every man wants to be.
I love dresses with sleeves.
I can’t remember what the chick from the opening scene looks like, I hope it becomes obvious who that is.
Piano music is still lovely.
No human talks like this, or perhaps ever talked like this.
Is this his wife or his sister or his secretary?
“My old so-and-so” kill me.
I love windowpane suits.
That’s a big ass breakfast.
This guy is an absolute creep just by the way he orders food.
Would any woman in 2026 actually accept a date from an old man who she is serving in a diner?
This guy is such a fucking weirdo.
Hannibal Lecter is Fabio compared to this fucking guy.
Holy shit I’m only20 minutes in.
Is it a red flag or a green flag when men have good relationships with their mothers?
Any man who reveals this amount of personal information this early must be using that as a mechanism to ensnare naive young ladies.
If they fuck on the first date I’m turning it off.
“I’m certain I was never meant to marry. I’m a confirmed bachelor. I’m incurable. Marriage would make me deceitful, and I would never want that.” Every male desires so strongly to be this fucking guy.
It’s his sister.
This guy and his sister are both serial killers.
“You have no breasts” what a line.
“I never really liked myself” – one of the most beautiful women I’ve ever seen. What an annoying fucking trope.
Are he and his sister fucking?
She’s HORNY.
All romance movies are just about beautiful women getting railed.
Loud ass toast.
He’s a dick but he’s right, it is fucking distracting.
“This is a quiet time, not to be misused.” Sage advice, maybe they’re not crazy.
50s?
Why is the music so evil in this catwalk scene?
I don’t know if this film is going to have any kind of deeper meaning, I think it’s just a shallow narrative.
It does suck when you hear bad news too early in the day.
I’m not literate enough to know which historical event this is about.
What the fuck is this taking back the dress scene?
This guy loves bacon.
Her royal highness is indeed quite pretty.
Grand gestures are annoying, this is relatable.
“This was an ambush.”
I don’t think I’m the target audience for this film.
Holy shit, arguments in chick films are so fucking annoying. I’m about to eat a bullet.
Holy Hell, I’m only halfway through this thing.
How did it suddenly get so interesting? If she kills him this movie might make a comeback.
AMAZING cello/bass part while she’s brewing the tea.
Wait is Cyrill going to die?
He looks like Bill Nye.
Evil woman.
I can’t tell if this is a chick flick or a dude flick, all the shitty dialogue and interactions are very female gaze, but the overarching theme of a woman weakening a man and distracting him from work is very male-centric.
At least the music is nice.
Spooky scene with his mother in the room.
Alma is straight up evil.
Manipulative cunt, a metaphor for the toxicity of contentedness that prevents hard work from being achieved.
Surely she’ll be punished for her actions?
He knows she did it right? He can’t have fallen for it.
Is he going to kill her?
Why is snow/winter so inherently romantic?
What the fuck is even the plot of this movie?
Alma is so evil.
A nasty, evil, hateable character.
Why does this poor man deserve to be tortured like this?
What the actual fuck is happening in this movie?
Damn, she’s gonna give him the mushrooms again
Why would she cut the mushrooms right in front of him? Oh she’s “just making him dinner”.
Nice music, though.
At least this film is making me feel something.
Heavy-handed yet nice touch with her pouring the water.
Insanely suspenseful while he’s chewing the omelette.
She is so evil.
Lame that he just gives into it.
Nice score.
I’m shocked how much the ending has revived the film. I do love a story where the characters are positively bonkers.
Strong ending, I’m impressed.
Second act was boring as shit.
Johnny Greenwood, good job.